A child and adolescent psychotherpist, Jo Doyle works with people up to the age of 20. She works with children after a family member has died, or children who face losing a family member to illness.
'Losing someone close is a life-changing event, and it's really important that that child gets held and supported.'
While the death of a loved one is difficult at any age, Jo says it's important to recognise that loss can impact a child's development. 'The loss of particularly a parent will shape the rest of their lives and the rest of their development.'
No two children or families is the same, so Jo adapts her work to fit the culture of the family. That could mean factoring in religious beliefs, family dynamics and support systems. 'It's looking at the child in that context and seeing what is needed to be the most helpful.'
Often, Jo's work means helping parents learn how to talk to their child. 'That's a very common concern for adults and the family: how much to say, when the child needs to know what's going on, and what language to use around it.'
Tackling grief
Jo says children need time and space to process their feelings. 'It's really important that children aren't made to move on too quickly, and that it's okay to feel anything that you're feeling and to explore those feelings and express them.' In Jo's work, this expression isn't solely through talking. 'There's also a lot of art and play, because sometimes children find it very difficult to put their thoughts into words.'
Jo is trained to look for the language that children use through action, play, and even artwork, translating this to emotions, or interpreting it for their parents.
Taking the plunge
Jo's used to plunging into chilly waters. She lives in Ōtautahi, Christchurch and each Sunday morning, she swims the sea with her group of dawn dippers. On Sunday 23 August, her dip will take place at Lake Brunner on the West Coast as she raises money for Kenzie's Gift, a charity she says is not a nice-to-have, but an essential service.
'As a culture, we're not very good at talking about death and dying. People avoid it, and they get really fearful of it and so Kenzie's Gift gives us a space and a purpose to talk about all the things that come up around death and dying and grieving.'
Back Jo's Big Winter Plunge here.
Kia kaha Jo. We're with you this winter as you brave the cold for tamariki and rangatahi. Thank you for your dedication and your mahi.
